


Heels Down, Head Up

by WhoGeek



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Hanzo Goes To Therapy, Hanzo is not sure about this 'horse' business, equine therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 01:48:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28805319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoGeek/pseuds/WhoGeek
Summary: Zenyatta and Genji manage to talk Hanzo into going to therapy. Zenyatta suggests equine therapy would be a good fit and although Hanzo isn't sure about that he's willing to give it a try. For Genji's sake.
Relationships: Hanzo Shimada & Tekhartha Zenyatta
Kudos: 5





	Heels Down, Head Up

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Hanzo Goes To Therapy Zine! It was a wonderful experience and I'm so grateful to have been one of the writers selected.

Hanzo is silent from the time the car leaves base. Zenyatta sits placidly beside him, as unbothered as usual by the silence. He looks up when the car turns off the road and onto a long drive between two fenced pastures and catches a glimpse of a sign that declares it to be “Jen’s Stable: Equine Therapy, Lessons, Trail Rides” before they’re past it and moving up towards a long, green-and-white building, parking between a battered truck and a smaller car.

“Are you ready, Hanzo?” Zenyatta has finally turned to face Hanzo, head tilted quizzically.

“I am still not sure about this… therapy.”

“That’s alright. I am glad you are willing to at least give it a try.”

Hanzo gives a jerky nod before they climb out of the car. The smell hits him immediately; animal musk and manure overwhelming everything else. He grits his teeth and follows Zenyatta up to the barn, a little bemused to see the omnic walking on the well-packed dirt as they approach.

An older white woman is visible in the shadows of the interior as they approach. She has silver hair pulled back into a braid, a worn flannel hanging open over a plain shirt, and jeans and boots both with a fine coating of mud. “Master Zenyatta and Mr. Shimada?”

“Indeed. Are you Dr. Owens?” Zenyatta proffers his hand to shake.

“I certainly am.” Dr. Owens grasps Zenyatta’s hand and gives a firm shake. “Welcome. Glad to see you wearing proper clothes for this.” Dr. Owens nods at Hanzo, smile widening as she holds her hand out to him. “I’m glad you came. Let me show you around a bit, we’ll talk about how your therapy here will work and then you can meet Trueno.”

“Of course, Dr. Owens.” Hanzo shakes her hand, unsurprised at her firm grip. “Lead the way.”

Dr. Owens leads Hanzo through the barn and points out the door to her office, the tack room and feed room, washing station, and down the rows of stalls. Out the far end of the stable is another area of packed dirt; a mounted rider and someone who must be their trainer is using an oval arena with jumps set up just to the left, another without any equipment sits to the right, and a small ring next to the empty oval. A narrow track extends down away from the arenas between the fences of the pastures. “This is where most lessons take place. The track leads down to the gates for the different pastures. Trueno gets turned out in pasture 3 and at some point you’ll be responsible for getting him each day and turning him back out into the pasture or putting him back in his stall. You’ll also be responsible for mucking out his stall, making sure he’s fed and has fresh water, cleaning up after him when you’ve used the ring or the arenas, brushing him down and bathing him when necessary.”

Part of Hanzo wants to protest the idea of having to do such menial tasks but he bites back the impulse. Zenyatta’s encouragement to at least try has him simply nodding as he follows Dr. Owens back into the barn and into her office. The office smells a little less of animals than the outside, even after Dr. Owens closes the door. A desk and cabinets sit on one side of the office, well-worn couches and chairs on the other. “Have a seat.”

Hanzo gingerly lowers himself onto the couch and is relieved to find it clean despite the clear wear of time on it. Something jingles behind the desk and Hanzo tenses for a split second before an ancient-looking dog appears, making a couple of soft ‘boof’ sounds as it walks over to sit nearly on Hanzo’s feet and plop its head in his lap.

“Charlie is technically retired from being a therapy dog but she still does her best to comfort folks.” Dr. Owens sits in the chair, picking up a tablet and glancing at it briefly. “Master Zenyatta did give me some information about your circumstances once the paperwork came through. I am curious to know why you agreed to try equine therapy.”

Hanzo sets one hand on Charlie’s head, smiling just a little when her tail thumps against the floor. “Zenyatta suggested that I might find it easier with someone outside of our...group. And that I would benefit from the experience, though he did not clarify on that point.”

“I certainly hope that you will benefit from it. Working with a horse is very intense, Mr. Shimada. These are very large animals and can be extremely dangerous if you aren’t careful. They are very attuned to body language, they can be very stubborn, and they are very group-focused. You have to learn to trust and communicate with each other. Are you still willing to try this? Take your time, Mr. Shimada.”

Hanzo mulls over Dr. Owens’ words for a long moment, fingers rubbing at the soft fur on Charlie’s head as the dog’s eyes droop and she sags harder against his leg. Genji’s scarred face and hopeful eyes flash through his mind and Hanzo grits his teeth. “Yes. I am willing to try.”

Dr. Owens smiles. “Alright. Let’s introduce you to Trueno.” Charlie looks up when Dr. Owens stands, sighs, and retreats back behind the desk. Hanzo stands and follows Dr. Owens back out into the barn.

They cross to the second row of stalls and walk down a couple doors to where a large red-brown head is peering over one door. A plaque on the wall half of the stall bears the name “Trueno” along with a little decorative squiggle in light blue paint. Hanzo has to fight down the panic trying to rise up in him. Trueno’s head is bigger, broader, than the other horses he’s seen here. Trueno snorts and shuffles side-to-side, head tossing as they approach.

“Trueno is a cross, Irish Cob and Thoroughbred.” Dr. Owens calmly opens the latch on the stall door and with a shove opens the door and leads Hanzo inside. Trueno obligingly steps back, huge hooves lifting high and sending the long fur around the bottom of each leg flaring out with each movement. Hanzo cannot bring himself to look away from the massive beast before him, even as Dr. Owens steps behind him to close the door and grab something that clinks faintly.

There’s a spot of white between Trueno’s eyes and another on his nose, connected by a thin streak of white that meanders a little across the broad face. After a moment Trueno shoves his face towards Hanzo’s hips, snuffling loudly and even trying to grab at his pockets. “What?!”

“He’s looking for treats. Just push his head a little bit and he’ll stop.” Hanzo glances at Dr. Owens before following the instruction.

“I promise you, there is nothing worth eating in my pockets.” Trueno moves easily as Hanzo presses a hand to the enormous face, letting out a gusty sigh that startles a laugh from Hanzo.

“Good, now you can put his halter on.” Hanzo turns as Dr. Owens offers the jingling bundle of straps and metal pieces. With some simple directions from her Hanzo is able to slide the halter onto Trueno and clasped in place. “Perfect, now the lead rope and we’ll head out to the ring and go over grooming, walk Trueno to his pasture, and that will be it for today.”

Hanzo takes the rope and clips it to the halter as Dr. Owens opens the stall door, grabs a bucket full of brushes and other implements, and leads him out and down towards the training area. Hanzo tugs a little on the rope to get Trueno moving, and the enormous beast falls into step behind them. Some of the tension bleeds out of Hanzo at that. A creature so large certainly does not need to do what a human asks, and yet Trueno follows easily.

The rest of the session is dedicated to learning how to tie a horse securely and safely, going over horse anatomy, safety, and talking about all the different grooming tools. With all this new information buzzing in his head, she has him untie the lead rope and retie it several times before nodding and pointing to the bucket of grooming supplies. “Now, you’re going to actually groom him.”

“Of course.” Hanzo hesitates for only a moment before getting to work. Dr. Owens quizzes him on anatomy as he works. Eventually she deems his work sufficient, leads him down to the pasture to turn out Trueno, and dismisses him for the day.

When he climbs into the car with Zenyatta the monk is silent until they start moving. “How was it? Do you think you will continue?”

Hanzo considers the question, glancing back at the barn as they head back toward the base. “It was… interesting. And I think I will continue.”

  
  


“Hello, Mr. Shimada. Are you ready to ride today?” Dr. Owens is carrying a saddle and a large piece of fabric under one arm and a bridle looped over her other shoulder as she approaches where Hanzo is standing in front of Trueno’s stall.

“I certainly hope so.”

“Well go ahead and bring him out and start grooming. Let’s see what you remember.”

Hanzo nods despite his nerves and picks up Trueno’s halter and lead rope before stepping into the stall. Trueno jerks his head a little bit as Hanzo slips the halter on but settles quickly and lets Hanzo lead him out of the stall. The bucket of grooming tools is still by the stall door and Hanzo almost forgets to grab it before heading out to the arenas. Charlie is lying out in the full sun right in the middle of the packed earth and her tail thumps a few times, stirring up a little dust when Hanzo steps out of the barn.

Dr. Owens watches as he ties Trueno’s lead rope to the hitching post. He sets the tools out of the way and grabs the metal hoof pick before turning to lean slightly against Trueno, running his free hand down and pulling on the front left leg to get Trueno to lift his foot up, quickly picking out the dirt there. “Tell me what you’re touching.”

“Pastern, hoof, frog.” He taps the little triangle of flesh with the back of the pick before letting the now-clean hoof drop and moving to the rear leg, setting his hand high up on Trueno’s hock. “Hock…” He pauses, running his hand down the long bone “Cannon?”

“Well remembered. Keep going.”

Hanzo resumes picking out the next three hooves then switches out the pick for the rubber curry comb. Hanzo glances at Dr. Owens before starting at Trueno’s neck, rubbing in quick circles and continuing to name points as he goes. “Neck, shoulder, withers, back, flank, barrel, croup.”

By the time he finishes both sides with the curry comb and drops it back in the bucket Dr. Owens is smiling a little bit. “I think I can safely assume you remember which parts are which.” Hanzo gives a tight smile in return, fishing the hard brush out of the bottom of the bucket. “What are the tools?”

“Hoof pick, curry comb, hard brush,” He lifts the brush in his hand, standing to begin brushing with the grain of the hair along the same areas he just covered with the curry comb and just slightly down Trueno’s legs. “Then it’s the soft brush, which gets used everywhere.” Trueno shoves his face against Hanzo’s shoulder when he starts brushing over him with the soft brush, startling a laugh out of Hanzo. The clever lips that try to pull at Hanzo’s pockets get another laugh before Hanzo gently shoves Trueno’s face away. “I still do not have anything for you in there.” Trueno blows out a heavy breath before settling again as Hanzo resumes brushing.

Dr. Owens is silent while Hanzo finishes with the brushing, only shifting a bit to pet Charlie when the old dog ambles over to sit practically on her boots and lean against her legs.

“Last is brushing out the mane and tail.” Hanzo picks up the comb for that and sets to working it through Trueno’s mane, which only has a few tangles, and then pulling the tail around to brush it out. The whole process is soothing; like maintaining stormbow, or going through katas.

“Perfect. Now to saddle up and get you up on horseback.”

Hanzo ignores the bubble of unease in his chest and turns to Dr. Owens, who is now standing with one hand on the saddle resting on the top rail of the hitching post. There’s a thick, rectangular piece of what looks like an old blanket over top of the saddle. “This is the saddle pad, which goes between the horse and the saddle. It needs to be clean of debris because it helps to prevent the saddle from causing sores. That’s also why you always groom before putting any tack on a horse.” She gestures for Hanzo to take the pad and he does. It’s surprisingly heavy for what looks like just some fabric. “It’s always stored upside down on top of the saddle to let it dry out. A moldy saddle pad is useless. Go ahead and put it on Trueno’s back, the front should be right at the front of the withers.”

Trueno doesn’t even twitch when Hanzo lays the pad across his back, adjusting it for a moment before turning back to Dr. Owens. “Check that it’s not folded up under itself on the other side.” Hanzo sighs but walks around to see the pad sitting perfectly and then back around to Dr. Owens. “Now, this is a Western saddle, since that’s what Trueno here has been trained for. The basic parts are the seat, pommel and horn, the cantle, stirrups and fenders, the girth, and the girth straps.” Dr. Owens touches each part as she names it, and that bubble of unease increases a bit. “There’s more specific names for other parts but those are the important parts.”

“Why…” Hanzo chokes back the question but Dr. Owens just looks at him and raises one eyebrow. “Why is the stirrup on the horn?” He stumbles over the words a bit, a little uncertain. It grates a little to feel so off-balance, stupid, needing so much direction. Each time Hanzo forces himself to think of Genji's expression; open, hopeful,  _ happy _ . He can manage this if it means having Genji in his life again.

“Having the off-side stirrup on the horn helps make sure you don’t catch it under the saddle when you put it on. Keeps things a little easier to get settled. Go ahead and put it on Trueno, the pommel should be over but not touching the withers.”

Hanzo lifts the saddle up and carries it over to Trueno, who has turned to watch the proceedings now. After a moment of consideration he hoists the saddle up, settling it on top of the pad before looking back to Dr. Owens as she steps up beside him and pulls the back of the saddle down more securely onto Trueno’s back. “Now you can push the girth off, and unhook the stirrup from the horn, then go around and make sure things are laying flat on the other side.”

The girth is twisted and Hanzo quickly untwists it and steps back around to stand next to Dr. Owens. “Now reach under, grab the girth, and pull it to this side. The girth is what keeps the saddle on the horse. If it’s too far back, you’ll end up sliding backwards, too far forward and you can’t get it properly tight, too loose and you’ll find yourself hanging upside down under your horse. It has to sit just behind the legs, and you need to have it tight enough to hold but you should still be able to get a couple fingers under it. You need to pull pretty hard on the strap to get it tight."

Hanzo watches Dr. Owens tighten the girth before loosening it and letting Hanzo do the same. "Does it not hurt?"

"If there are sores, or it's too tight, it would. But grooming is also for checking for sore spots, and if it's too tight you can't get fingers under the girth." Dr. Owens continues, guiding his hands through tying the leather end into a knot on the proper D-ring several times, then looping the loose end through a small bit of leather Hanzo had initially taken to be just for decoration. “This keeps the girth strap from falling down into the horse’s legs and getting tangled."

"I can see how that would be disastrous."

"Indeed. Now you can set the stirrup length. You can use your arm length to get it pretty close to where you'll need it." The strap and buckle hidden by the fender is simple enough, though Hanzo is sceptical about using his arms to estimate the appropriate position.

"Finally, the bridle." Dr. Owens once again goes over the parts, explaining the bit, reins, throatlatch and chinstrap while removing Trueno's halter and sliding the bridle on instead. "Some horses take some convincing to take the bit, so don't be surprised, just keep coaxing." The bridle comes off and she offers it to Hanzo.

Trueno does try and move away from the bit when Hanzo offers but only for a second. "Keep the throat latch fairly loose, you don't want to strangle your horse." Hanzo turns to see Dr. Owens smiling, "Congratulations, you have succeeded in tacking up your horse. Now you can actually ride him."

"That is a lot of equipment to remember."

"It is, but it's either to keep you safely on, him safely wearing it, or allows you to communicate with him. And you're proving a quick study, so I'm sure you'll master the logistics and be doing it all on your own in no time. Now, use the reins to gently lead Trueno to the arena."

Dr. Owens leads them to the arena, opening the gate and gesturing Hanzo through.

“Before you mount up, always tighten the girth again. A lot of horses will tense up or puff out their chest, but they can’t hold that once they start moving.”

Hanzo pulls the girth tight again, checks that he can get his fingers under it, and tightens up the knot. “Alright.”

“Now, grip the mane and the reins in your left hand, left foot in the stirrup, right hand on the horn.” She watches as Hanzo follows her instructions before continuing. “Pull the reins a little tighter. You want to be able to quickly pull back and stop him if he starts moving.” A nod once he adjusts his grip. “All together you’re going to use your left hand to pull up, stand up on your left foot, and swing your right leg straight out over the cantle and his rump and ease into the saddle.”

A moment of consideration and Hanzo hoists himself up, swinging his leg over and sitting into the saddle. Trueno shifts and Hanzo sucks in a startled breath, legs squeezing around the wide chest. Trueno starts to walk forward and Hanzo panics, hauling back on the reins.

Trueno snorts, tosses his head, and starts to back up. It takes an embarrassing long couple of seconds for Dr. Owens’ voice to make sense. “Mr. Shimada, relax your hands, loosen the reins, you need to stop pulling back and stop squeezing with your legs. Relax.”

Hanzo drops the reins like they’re on fire, although making his legs relax takes a moment longer. “This is pointless. I cannot even properly mount a horse. This is a waste of time and I should not even be here.”   
  


“Hanzo!” Dr. Owens’ voice cracks through the spiral of frustration and he locks eyes with her. “You mounted up perfectly. Where you went wrong was in giving Trueno conflicting instructions. Squeezing his sides meant ‘go’ and pulling on the reins meant ‘stop’ and then ‘back up’ when you kept pulling. A lot of people do that the first time they sit on a horse. You’re sitting on a thousand pound animal and the only thing keeping you on is the saddle, and the only way to direct him is with your legs and the reins. It’s natural to be uncertain about that and react badly.”

“I should have done better.”

“Why? Have you ever ridden before?”

“No.”

“So why wouldn’t you make a mistake? You’re learning a new skill; mistakes are a part of that process. If you don’t mess up, how can you expect to get  _ better _ ? You have to learn the skills before you can improve on them.”

“I...see.”

“Now, you need to get your right foot into the stirrup, lean down if you need to use your hand to do so. Your legs should be bent, but not making a right angle, and you need to keep your heels down so the heel of your boot will catch on the stirrup if your feet slide forward.” Dr. Owens spends a minute checking both stirrups, leaving Hanzo to think and collect his composure somewhat.

“Looking good. Now, take the reins, one in each hand, elbows relaxed and at your sides, hands just above the pommel, knuckles down, thumbs on top of the reins.” A quick adjustment and Dr. Owens steps back. “Keeping your back straight and letting your hips move with him, you’re going to turn Trueno to face the other way by pulling one rein gently back and out. Then relax back to center when you’re satisfied with how far he’s turned.”

Hanzo can feel his breath catch as he pulls the left rein as directed and Trueno’s head moves, and then the rest of his body follows until they’ve turned fully around. “Now the other way, remember to keep your heels down.” Hanzo pushes his heels down a bit more as he pulls the right rein. “Good. Give a short squeeze with your legs to get him walking forwards. And look up where you’re headed.”

Trueno lurches forward a step and Hanzo pulls back on both reins, bringing him to a stop. “Sorry.”

“No need to apologize, just try again. Try walking him to the center of the ring and stopping him there. Trust his feet and the saddle to keep you upright.”

This time Hanzo manages to relax. There’s a rhythm to the movement and Hanzo relaxes into it as he gets used to the feeling. Trueno takes a couple extra steps before stopping and Hanzo frowns until Dr. Owens says “Excellent. Now walk to the rail, that’s the fence around the arena, turn left, and keep walking.”

Hanzo gets Trueno moving again, and follows Dr. Owens’ directions as she calls out for the next thirty minutes; walking, turning, stopping, starting again. Some instructions are to adjust his heels, his back, his shoulders, his hands. It takes all his concentration to keep his posture correct and also direct Trueno’s movements and Hanzo is tired by the time she has him dismount and lead Trueno back out of the arena. She gives sparse directions to remove Trueno’s tack and brush him down, letting Hanzo do most of it himself.

“Very good for a first lesson, we’ll make a decent horseman out of you yet. Grab the saddle and pad and I’ll show you where things go and leave you to turn Trueno out for the day. Next week I’d like you to have him groomed and ready to tack up before lesson time.”

For the first time Hanzo doesn’t balk at the idea of the next time. “Alright, Dr. Owens. Next week."

  


**Author's Note:**

> As a disclaimer: I myself am not familiar with equine therapy, nor am I an expert on horses, although I am familiar with riding and a competent rider myself. Please take my depiction of equine therapy with a grain of salt.


End file.
